Dirty Poker Joke
Two couples were playing cards one evening. John accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed that Bill's wife Sue, legs spread wide, wasn't wearing any underwear! Shocked by this, John upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red faced.
Later, John went to the kitchen to get some refreshments. Bill's wife followed and asked, "Did you see anything that you liked under there?" Surprised by her boldness, John courageously admitted that, well, indeed he did. She said, "Well, you can have it, but it will cost you $100". After taking a minute or two to assess the financial as well as the moral costs of this offer, John indicates that he is indeed interested. She tells him that since her husband, Bill, works Friday afternoons and John doesn't, that John should be at her house around 2.00 PM Friday afternoon.
When Friday rolled around, John showed up at Bill's house for the planned time with Sue at 2:00 PM sharp and after paying her the agreed sum of $100 they went to the bedroom and closed their sexual transaction as Sue had promised.
Afterwards, John quickly dressed and left. As usual, Bill came home from work at 6:00 PM and upon entering the house, asked his wife abruptly, "Did John come by the house this afternoon?" A little worried, Bill's wife answered, "Why yes, he did stop by for few minutes this afternoon." Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her husband curtly asked, "And did he give you $100?" In terror, she assumed that somehow he had found out, and after mustering up her best poker face, replied, "Well, yes, in fact he did give me $100."
Bill, with a satisfied look on his face, surprised his wife by saying, "Good, I was hoping he did. John came by the office this morning and borrowed $100 from me. He promised me he'd stop by our house this afternoon on his way home and pay me back."
NOW THAT'S A POKER PLAYER ! ! !
Q&A Poker Jokes
Q:How do you get a professional poker player off your front porch?
A:Pay him for the pizza.
Q:What's the difference between a professional poker player and a large pepperoni pizza?
A:The pizza can feed a family of four.
Poker Jokes are they really funny?
Dan Okrent -- the public editor of the New York Times, the Beloved Founder of Rotiserrie baseball and my former boss at Life -- about his favorite poker joke, he said there's no such thing as a good poker joke. And he ought to know. Among his many idiosyncratic pursuits, he keeps a list of the greatest punch lines of all-time -- and nary a poker punch line made the cut.
